A couple years back, Massachusetts voted on a referendum to overturn some of the commonwealth’s blue laws that disallow the sale of alcohol in most grocery stores. I was certain the referendum would pass by an overwhelming majority. Who in their right mind would say no to allowing someone to pick up some Chianti while purchasing their Newman’s spaghetti sauce? The proposition failed. Soon after, I found myself at a party railing against this anonymous, insipid majority that was depriving me of my rightful conveniences. Just then, a voice belonging to, let’s say, Sarah, a professor from Boston College, spoke up from across the patio’s fire pit. “I voted NO,” offered the unembarrassed voice. “For heaven’s sake, why?!” I nearly shouted. “It’s been this way for many years, and it’s working just fine the way it is,” was the professor’s response.
The Super Bowl should be played on a Saturday night. The game has become an excuse for a celebration and a mid-winter party. People who don’t know Randy Moss from peat moss happily attend gatherings in order to drink cold beer, feast on chicken wings, and publicly review the new TV commercials. Fans (and saloons as well) have long complained that the Sunday evening game curtails revelry. Most people have to get up and begin their workweek early the next day. When was the last Super Bowl party you went to that didn’t deflate by the second half, the specter of Monday looming? Faced with this sensible request for a positive, sympathetic change, NFL spokesman Brian McCarthy says, “We hear this each year. The concept of playing the Super Bowl on a Sunday has worked well for 44 years and we don’t anticipate moving away from this tradition. Fans expect to see the Super Bowl on a Sunday, the day on which 89.2 percent of NFL games are played.” Rotary phones have worked well for decades. What do we need with cell phones? Who needs a computer when you’ve got access to paper, a pencil, and microfiche? By the way, every time I’m at the supermarket but have to drive across town to pick up a bottle of wine, I text my “friend” Sarah and thank her most kindly for voting NO.
