The New Plastics Economy report from the World Economic Forum sounds the alarm that plastic waste in the oceans will soon outweigh the fish there. This bad news comes hot on the heels of two other major announcements that indicate The End is Very Bloody Nigh. First, scientists have officially declared that the planet has entered a new geological phase: the Anthropocene Era, when it is clear that people have had an irreversible impact on Earth. Future generations will look back in puzzlement and … oh hang on, they won’t, because there probably won’t be any future generations, according to Stephen Hawking. Humanity could fail within a century because of the threats of “nuclear war, global warming and genetically engineered viruses,” Hawking tells Radio Times, unless we take action now.
In what must be the most depressing interview ever published in a TV guide, Hawking states that, much like in Interstellar, Earthlings’ future is not actually on Earth. However, he warns that “we will not establish self-sustaining colonies in space for at least the next hundred years, so we have to be very careful in this period.” So there. In the meantime, tonight’s special, if we can find any, is the lobster.