Ah, the life of a celebrity. Having burly people around to protect your physical person is one thing, but what about guarding against spam? Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt have Internet bodyguards who monitor what is clicked at the Jolie-Pitt residence … because, well, they’re Brangelina. I imagine a nerd, improbably for a computer geek both highly paid and super-groomed, blocking access to reports about Jennifer Aniston and Colin Farrell. In fact, they hired cyber-monitors to ensure their children don’t see anything inappropriate. Like Tomb Raider 2, for example? Or a description of their mother as “a minimally talented spoiled brat“?
Vanity Fair reports that both Pitt and Jolie are Internet amateurs. “It’s so beyond what we understand,” Jolie says. “We wouldn’t even know what to look for. . . It’s a scary new world.” Hang on, wasn’t she in Hackers? Surely she should have this whole Sony Hack nonsense under control by now.