Okay, so here’s the headline: Man Kills Himself Trying to Blow Up Condom Machine. I don’t really have much to add … except What. The. Actual. F*ck!?! In a Christmas gift to humanity, or possibly a last-minute entry to the 2015 Darwin Awards, or possibly an extreme method of birth control, a man in Germany killed himself when he tried to blow up a condom vending machine.
On Christmas Day, police in the town of Schoeppingen found cash and condom packets on the ground near the destroyed machine, reports the Associated Press. The man was hit by flying debris from the machine after he and two friends triggered an explosion. The other men brought him to hospital, initially claiming his injuries were because he fell down a flight of stairs, which, in fairness, is a much less ignoble way to die.